Thursday, September 11, 2008

The unchanging Ms. Mazi

Mistress has done this a few times.

She will ask me to do something that will at first glance, cause a conflict with my rules. Today she asked me to explain something to a girl she is considering. When I responded that I might need to use the 'T' word, she just told me that I had better be careful. No exception for the sake of explaining something, no lenience, no temporariness of the rules. Her rules are THE rules.

It would have been so easy for her to lift that rule - especially for just a few minutes - but she didn't. That firmness and concreteness somehow builds security for me. Regardless of what ever else changes and bends, that part of SL is so very stable. It is oddly comforting.

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I interviewed a girl for Mistress today. It is so stressful for me to do that. I have to try to get inside the mind of the Mazi. What would SHE ask and what would SHE have that answer mean? That part is hard enough but when Mistress asks me for my opinions about the person I talked, I just feel this huge weight (I before E except after W?) on me, like this poor person's fate with Mistress hangs on my words. I feel like a Roman emperor doing the thumbs up or down to a gladiator. I am hopefully a little less heartless that they are always portrayed to be.

So anyway this girl, Dina seemed to do well but she is not a native English speaker. There are so many nuances that are lost when I talk to her. I am anxious to see what happens. /me smiles.

I am already worried that I will get ahead of myself. I must remember my position!

Every time I am with my 2 people in SL - Mistress and Jan - I leave SL even closer to those two. What they feel for me, I most surely feel for them.

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