You've been telling me from the start not to think. How is it possible not to think? It’s like in Ghostbusters when the giant marshmallow man attacked New York - a person can't NOT think. It's just impossible.
I’ve been realizing the difference between thinking and responding instinctually. If you ask an awkward question and I stop and think about it, the answer will be quite different than if I give an immediate, gut response. It’s an ancient test-taking strategy to go with your first answer on a tough question because it will usually be correct; over thinking a question will lead to an unnecessarily complex (and probably wrong) answer. It’s like that with you.
If I just answer without thinking, you’ll get the raw, unadulterated me. If I think about the answer, you still get me but quite a different flavor of me. You get the calculating, reasoned, posturing me and not the naked, exposed me.
I realized this not all at once; it was sort of a process and after all the thought I’ve given it, I will be more than a little frustrated with myself if I’ve gotten it wrong.